Bert's Unorthodox Guidebook to Life

2012-02-06T22:49:00.001+08:00

Honestly.
Sometimes I really wonder why I actually care so much.

2012-01-17T22:58:00.001+08:00

Something isn't right with me huh. Oh well...

2012-01-16T22:35:00.001+08:00

Sometimes I wonder. Is it really that hard? Cause it's getting ridiculous.

2011-12-09T21:54:00.001+08:00

Just maybe.

2011-12-08T22:35:00.004+08:00

Ouch...
I hate having to keep this in.
It's like some war between emotion and rationality.

I can only go so far. And well no one waits forever.

One thing I hate about myself, thinking too much.

2011-11-26T12:49:00.001+08:00

I can't read you because I'm afraid.
Afraid of what I might find out.

2011-11-17T22:03:00.000+08:00

"人生本来就有很多事是徒劳无功"

Story of my life. Oh well...

2011-11-08T23:04:00.001+08:00

Not done studying.
Wtf am I doing.

Note to self: FOCUSSSS

but I miss you already

2011-10-20T22:33:00.000+08:00

Told ya so.

2011-10-20T21:23:00.000+08:00

Another one of those days...

2011-10-05T22:08:00.001+08:00

And all of a sudden I don't know what I'm doing.
I really don't.

2011-10-03T22:51:00.004+08:00

Lol it has come to my attention that my blog doesn't exactly say anything much apart from my day-to-day rambles and one liners.
Yknow they say a picture speaks a thousand words?
No one ever said a mere sentence can't achieve that.

think less breathe more think less breathe more

2011-10-03T20:24:00.001+08:00

Oh well...

2011-09-26T22:08:00.004+08:00

Ignorance is bliss.

2011-09-21T18:42:00.002+08:00

I'm a hair's breadth away from typing it. But.
@!%#
yes it has 4 letters.

2011-09-21T13:36:00.002+08:00

Just shoot me.

2011-09-20T01:18:00.001+08:00

One day at a time.

2011-09-07T17:19:00.001+08:00

Note to self: Breathe.

2011-09-07T09:19:00.002+08:00

Some questions don't have to be answered.

Who knows.

2011-09-04T13:24:00.002+08:00

To think that it took me so long to get so far only to find myself back at the beginning.
I guess I saw this coming. Deep down somewhere. I knew.
Haha refused to believe it as usual. I'm an idiot.
Somehow this shouldn't be unfamiliar. It's a path I've walked down before.

But.

Where do I go from here?

Lifehouse - You And Me

2011-08-27T22:08:00.000+08:00

2011-08-25T23:30:00.002+08:00

If only things were more straight forward.
Why can't life just be simple? Is it too much to ask?

2011-08-23T23:13:00.000+08:00

After a while we forget that we too are only human.

2011-08-20T00:52:00.000+08:00

$@#%@^@$%^@#%#$%#^$@#%^#%#$%^#@^$%&*#%^@%

This has got to be one of the worst days ever. Feel like shit man.

So please...

2011-08-16T23:01:00.002+08:00

BREATHE.
One thing at a time.

2011-08-04T20:47:00.001+08:00

But I'm afraid.

2011-07-22T22:09:00.003+08:00

Haha yet another month has passed with me going on a hiatus.

Anyways things seem to be taking an interesting twist haha (:
Hopefully it all goes well. Hopefully.

On the other hand... Looks like there's a new outbreak of wildfires.
Then again it does make life amusing :D

2011-06-17T16:05:00.001+08:00

And I'm the last one...
Sometimes I just have so little confidence in myself haha.
Ironic huh.

2011-05-12T22:33:00.000+08:00

AH PANIC.
PLEASE SAY TOMORROW GOES FINE. OMG.

2011-05-10T21:50:00.001+08:00

Let's do this.

2011-05-06T22:15:00.003+08:00

*BREATHE*

Freaking losing focus already haha.
Ended up slacking off way too much today ):

On the bright side I have one lecture left to cover! WOOO!

Bleah. Then it's back to making up for whatever I have already forgotten...

Not much longer... Maybe then...

2011-04-28T23:26:00.000+08:00

What is going on...
Maybe I think too much. As usual. lol.

2011-04-19T22:53:00.001+08:00

I am super distracted.
Somehow it's during such periods that these kinds of things pop up.

Good or bad. I don't know. I never do now don't I.

2011-04-16T23:15:00.001+08:00

Damn I am a sucky driver hahaha.
I really wish I was better. Lol hopefully after more practise I get better...
Then again I wish I was better in so many other things.

Yeah that included.

2011-04-13T22:18:00.002+08:00

Things really are getting stressful man. Seriously.
Somehow I pray that I cope. Haha. I really do.

Feels weird how I'm stressing over exams and half way around the world a nuclear crisis is unfolding. *sigh*

(:

2011-04-09T10:13:00.002+08:00

April 9th.
Haha undoubtedly my favourite day of the year (:
It's on this day that really I feel the true warmth of the human spirit.
The world is getting crazier and wonkier as the years go by and once in awhile it really is nice to feel surrounded by people who care.

Then again today has much been overshadowed by the crisis unfolding in japan.
So yeah my heart really goes out to them.
I pray that everything goes well... I really do...

It's like a pendulum. swaying back and forth. when will I truly know.

2011-04-08T00:45:00.000+08:00

2011-04-05T21:34:00.002+08:00

I guess things can't be anticipated that easily.
Damn if only my theories and concepts on life held true all the time.
Where is ceterus paribus when you need it...
Haha well at least it keeps me guessing.

It's back. This feeling.

2011-04-03T22:38:00.003+08:00

Songs just seem so much nicer when the lyris make sense to you don't they.
Haha makes you feel like you're not alone.

2011-04-02T22:11:00.005+08:00

Keep telling yourself that.
We're worlds apart....
I don't know. Pfft.

2011-03-31T23:14:00.002+08:00

Actually I really don't know how this is going to turn out.
Haha it really is kind of messy.
Seriously. Information asymmetry isn't so great after all. Haha...
Oh how oh how.
Why is it that I'm so great at helping people but not myself? Why?

Please say I was right.

2011-03-29T21:43:00.001+08:00

Taking an interesting twist.
:D Things are looking good

For once. Maybe.

2011-03-25T20:43:00.003+08:00

Ah @#%$
I think I'm falling sick again. Yeah feeling awfully shitty today.
Can't even mug properly. Haha maybe it's a sign...
Hopefully I get better for tomorrow D:
Going to own some juniors hahaha. Exciting huh.

Maybe I should give it a while. See if it's for real.

2011-03-24T19:23:00.003+08:00

It just dawned on me that the things I say, do, "like", on facebook are scrutinised word by word, action by action, by people.
It's kind of scary when I think about it.
The retarded things that I say or post may just lead to greater repercussions that I for one may not be prepared for... Haha and if you know me, I hate the unexpected.
Mmm maybe that's why I hate horror movies... Ah I digress. Haha.
Anyways I guess that's why I find myself here once more, after deserting this place for ages...
Then again I really wonder how many people know this. Haha honestly I highly doubt people know I blog or well blogged, taking into account the fact that this place just experienced the ice age.
It's stupid but yeah this blog pops up if you google my name. Hoho freaking internet stalkers!

*Keeping my eye on the visitor counter*

Hahaha.

Can I muster the courage once more?

2011-03-22T19:20:00.001+08:00

One step at a time. Take it slow.

2011-03-21T20:45:00.000+08:00

Talking to the moon...

2011-03-15T17:26:00.000+08:00

Hmm I wonder how I'm going to solve this issue...
Seriously a mine field.

2011-03-13T15:11:00.002+08:00

Wow haha it's nearly been a year.
Seriously time flies. Haha can't seem to stop saying that.
But it's true.

I don't know why I'm back here. Maybe it's cause of that... maybe...

2010-07-24T23:24:00.003+08:00

Wow. It really has been a while.

I don't know, but the impetus that used to drive me here has all but dried up.
It seems that I no longer have the motivation to empty my trashcan of thoughts and musings.

I seem to have changed. For better or for worse, I have yet to find out.

I just stopped knowing.

2010-04-18T22:30:00.002+08:00

For I shall disappear from the face of civilization for no less than 3 weeks.
Goodbye.

You know I'll miss you. I always have.

Yah there's the bed, the air-con, the TV, the computer...

2010-04-14T20:23:00.002+08:00

Haha I no longer have any motivation or drive to continue blogging.

I don't know. It's like blogging is no longer on my list of "things to do".
Maybe it's cause of the army. Just maybe. I think there are so many other things that I could spend my time doing, such as sleeping haha, that I would probably derive greater personal satisfaction.

Passing out of BMT was a really awesome sensation. The sense of achievement or more so the knowledge that I wouldn't have to think, smell, breathe army for 10 days was intoxicating. Well BMT taught me several "essential" skills and has definitely made me a stronger person. For a more detailed list and explanation of the skills I picked up, please do approach me personally. Haha. Like seriously ;D

Anyways, this week was really spent attending all the university entrance "tests". Hopefully they turn out alright... I hope... Haha totally messed up the second interview for med. Well there's nothing much I can do about it now, except to wait, to pray, to hope.

Hopefully things turn out the way they should.

It's weird when people have more confidence in you than you have for yourself.
Isn't it?

2010-04-02T22:57:00.001+08:00

I'm still alive (:

Haha just haven't quite found the time to blog.

Sorry ;D

2010-02-03T00:26:00.002+08:00

1 more day of freedom.
I don't know. Somehow part of me is kind of looking forward to this.
Actually having something to do instead of frolicking around, seriously wasting my life away.

I guess it's better to look forward to it rather then dread it. Haha expectations have a significant influence on reality. So it does make sense to be optimistic; hopefully then it wouldn't be so bad.

BRING IT ON~

10 days without air-con, after which it's time to collect ang baoz~

I don't know. Sometimes I question the actual meaning of friendship.
It's a two way thing damnit.

2010-01-20T18:01:00.002+08:00

There are moments in our lives where we find ourselves at a crossroad; not knowing which path to follow, or whether to simply turn back.
And before you take that step forward things start racing through your mind, questioning your very being.
For a second we spiral into a void of confusion where irrationality prevails. The cost-benefit system we so often laud becomes insignificant where we merely consider the disadvantages at hand.

Breathe.

I can do this. Haha.

2010-01-16T00:43:00.001+08:00

Retard. I'm better than that.

2010-01-13T21:05:00.001+08:00

You ever look a picture of yourself, and see a stranger in the background?. It makes you wonder how many strangers have pictures of you. How many moments of other peoples life have we been in. Were we a part of someone's life when their dream came true or were we there when their dream died. Did we keep trying to get in? As if we were somehow destined to be there or did the shot take us by surprise. Just think, you could be a big part of someone elses life, and not even know it.

OTH~

2010-01-07T21:43:00.000+08:00

I'm going to make a difference.
I am.

2010-01-04T23:32:00.000+08:00

What do I want from life?

Of lights that coloured the sky.

2010-01-01T02:24:00.002+08:00

The fireworks that signaled the end of 2009 and beginning of 2010 were in my opinion worth seeing. With the bursts and explosions, I was once again submerged into a state of reflection.

2009 has come and gone. Just like that. And with that we jump into 2010. Just like that.

2009 was definitely eventful but I pray that 2010 will be less of a headache.
Haha...

Anyways here's wishing everyone the very best for 2010 (:

Hello 2010. Bring it on~

2009-12-28T14:08:00.002+08:00

Haha This post may be a little late in coming. I just haven't quite been in the mood to do anything productive these days. It's like the holiday mood just chiseled itself into my being. Eat, sleep, shit has been my daily routine. Damn haha.

Anyways I just got back from Korea which was pretty nice. Haha apart from Jeju which I found a bore, the rest of the trip was decent I guess.
I really did a lot of things for the first time. Horse riding, skiing and SITTING ON A ROLLER COASTER! Yes Yes! I think the adrenaline rush that one gets while doing the 360s and the drops at breakneck speeds is just addictive. My mind just goes blank and there's this indescribable surge of euphoria. Haha it's like smoking pot or something.
So I guess those were the highlights of the trip. Oh throw in the face shop as well :D

Anyhow going overseas is always a good way to end off the year haha. Just stoning around on the bus really lets you do some serious thinking and reflecting. Pft. Well that's just me (:

Lets me sort things out.
Becomes less of a mess.

2009-12-18T18:58:00.001+08:00

See you on Christmas or something.

2009-12-18T15:14:00.000+08:00

I like going overseas cause it's only then that I can let go of everything.

2009-12-10T00:17:00.001+08:00

For I wish upon a shooting star.

2009-12-09T23:34:00.003+08:00

Ah.
Finally everything is over. A levels done. Just like that.
Who would've guessed it would just fly by so fast.

To be honest I'm experiencing mixed feelings at the moment.
Relief that the A's are over and I survived. Restless in that I have taken a step closer to my dreams. Elation over all the friends that I made. Disappointment in all that I have failed to achieve. Sadness in all that I have to let go. Somber in all that I will have to give up.
This compounded with things that have been happening... Haha I think I could qualify for an emotional wreck.
I don't know what to feel.
Maybe it all cancels out and I'm indifferent about everything holistically.

My two years in RJ have really been eventful and I would never trade anything for the memories that I have accumulated. Well these are all that I have left of RJ. Ok maybe including the friends that I still know. Haha.

Junior college life has had its ups and downs. Its peaks and its nadirs. I admit, life wasn't smooth sailing. Haha if you know me well then you should well understand why; but hey I learnt so much these two years and this would be discounting all the stuff included in the curriculum.
Yeah sure I learnt about the mechanism of respiration and how to solve differential equations, but there was more that JC life gave me.
It gave me lessons that no textbook or tutor could ever give. It taught me lessons on life itself.
My first "love", my first heartache, my first reconciliation. What to do, when to do, how to do.
I think these are the experiences that I will take away from JC and that I will never forget.
For that I am thankful. Thankful to everyone who contributed to my learning and everyone who ever believed in me. Thank you. Yes especially you. Without you I would have been nothing.

If there's another thing that I want to take away from RJ and never ever lose, it would be all the friendships forged. Ok maybe not all. Haha we have to be realistic here. Yeah there would be people who I lose touch with and who I may totally forget. That's just part and parcel of life. We move away from the past and enter the future. However there are some people that I really want to hold on to. It's like a bond formed without me being aware of it. Now that I think of it, I wouldn't know what I'd be without these people. Like a lost soul without his bearings. I really do pray that I manage to keep in contact with such friends. I really do.

Gosh the thought that today would be the last day seeing most of my friends (excluding results day) is really scary. Haha maybe that's why all these weird emotions are running havoc.
I don't know. I don't know.

I pray it turns out alright.

Damnit. And it all just came rushing back. To think that I was deluding myself all this while. What was I thinking... I will not mess this up again. That I promise.

2009-12-04T19:18:00.002+08:00

Wow A levels are over... Like seriously over.
Never coming back again~

I don't know. It doesn't quite feel like my JC life is over when it actually is.
Kind of ironic i know.

Maybe i'll get more inspiration after prom tomorrow. Just maybe.

Brain.
Empty.

Heart.
Empty.

2009-11-30T00:37:00.001+08:00

Does it mean anything if "sorry" is what you hear most?

2009-11-28T23:05:00.000+08:00

Why does this keep happening? Haha.
Fate?

2009-11-26T23:35:00.002+08:00

Hey!
Haha was walking around Raffles City when I saw this art gallery. Real cool stuff in there. Serious.
Anyways this artist, Coplu seriously got my attention with his pieces. Haha they may come across a little weird, full of big noses and bigger hearts. I found them really nice though. Haha I so plan on getting one piece when I'm old and have a job.
Anyways since I don't have the necessary financial clout, I did one for myself :D Hopefully this doesn't infringe any copyrights or what not.

Lawl if it does I'd be happy to take it down :D

2009-11-24T23:20:00.005+08:00

Mmm one more paper left in a week's time but then somehow it feels like the A levels is about over.
Oh wait it is about over.
ONE MORE BIO MCQ~
Haha so for this I shall not ramble on and on about JC life and so on.
It's not over yet (:

For today...
You know people always say things such as education increases inequity or race results in inequality, rambling on and on about fairness.
These really are indeed relevant points of contention.
However the overarching idea is that
Life itself is inherently unfair.

The moment each and everyone of us is born, we have already been subjected to life's fairness or unfairness. If you're born into a rich ass family that owns sentosa or the country, then maybe life has been more fair to you then to any other person.

Then again what is fairness? Due to the subjective nature of "fairness", to some life may have on the contrary been unfair to you. (ok lol circular argument. Whatever)
Anyways, this innate subjectivity is another reason life can never be fair.

Blah I just feel a great deal of indignation when someone deserving can't pursue something because of circumstances that he has no control over. It just isn't fair. I admit life has more or less been very fair to me and I am thankful. It's just that sometimes I feel others deserve more than what I have.

So all of us here who have internet and are reading this.
(: another reason to be thankful that fate dealt us a decent set of cards.

I'm going to try and change that. Somehow. I don't know how though. Yet.

2009-11-23T23:56:00.001+08:00

2009-11-10T21:55:00.001+08:00

Here we go.

BRING IT ON~
11 more.

2009-11-03T22:51:00.002+08:00

Am I ready?
Haha to be honest, I really don't know.
I never really feel confident that I'm ready for anything and any exam for that matter.
Who's to know?
People say I am but hey what do they know (:
What do I know?

Bring it on.

2009-11-02T22:46:00.000+08:00

One more week~
And somehow I feel excited o.0

2009-10-29T22:51:00.000+08:00

o.0 do i start praying now?

2009-10-16T22:35:00.002+08:00

Damn that was fast.

Today was "farewell assembly" which is kind of weird cause we're technically not done with JC yet, but we've sort of graduated. Ok that came out weird. Ah whatever.

Honestly haha I think it was pretty much a waste of time.

First of all I personally feel that the principal totally gave the wrong speech. I was rather put off by it. Her speech would have better suited a council farewell rather than a batch farewell. I would estimate a good 70% of her speech went out to councillors.
I mean, yeah sure the councillors (some) have put in a whole lot of work and hell yeah they deserve credit for it, but solely focussing on them and leaving other groups on the fringe is uncalled for. If she had wanted to laud and sing all the praise to the councillors then
1) Maybe they should have a final council retreat where she could sing all the songs she wants.
or 2) Not leave out the other CCA groups to such an unreasonable degree. I think elaborating less on council and maybe a little more on other groups would have gone down better for me. A cursory mention does no justice whatsoever to these groups that probably put in just as much (or maybe more) effort. btw community advocates was omitted. (Sucks to you Charles)
Haha just some of my normal ramblings.

Secondly, clapping on and on was a bore. Yeah, SOME of those who went up really deserved their award and blablabla; but for the rest of us "normal individuals" it was just another assembly, just another period to clap and clap and clap and occasionally laugh at the guy going up. Hehe I'm being a bastard here sorry :D

Apart from these I think the last part was quite nice. The song and all. A rather nice way to tie up nearly 2 long years of memories and experiences (:
So much has happened that... Haha I don't want to even talk about it now.

Thank you. That's one more thing settled.

2009-10-11T23:05:00.000+08:00

Something I came across... and damn it so speaks my mind.

My Friend...

When you are sad, I will get you drunk and help you plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.

When you are blue, I'll dislodge whatever is choking you.

When you smile, I'll know you finally got laid.

When you are scared, I will rag you about it every chance I get.

When you are worried, I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it can be and to quit whining.

When you are confused, I will use little words to explain it to your sorry ass.

When you are sick, stay away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.

When you fall, I will point and laugh at your sorry ass.

This is my oath, I pledge till the end. Why you may ask? Because you're my friend.

Like seriously.

2009-10-10T22:50:00.000+08:00

Just a nobody.

2009-10-08T23:14:00.001+08:00

The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.

~Ralph Waldo Emerson

That answer your question?

The fine line that competition treads

2009-10-04T17:34:00.003+08:00

%@$!

Now that Singtel has won the bid to broadcast the EPL AND ESPN...
I'm totally going WTF.

Being a Starhub subscriber, it now means I no longer get to view any EPL matches (which I couldn't really care much for) AND I CAN'T WATCH THE AUSTRALIAN OPEN AND WIMBLEDONNNN OMG...

This really is crap. So I guess I'm stuck with Roland Garros and the US open...
Hai.
Just when I was starting to get hooked onto tennis.

It's kind of ironic isn't it? How competition, which is supposed to be the panacea to all consumers' worries has backfired and left us in a lurch. We've been served. Damnit. Oh how we used to worship competition.
So now if we want full coverage of the EPL and Grand slams we need both Mio TV and Starhub Cable. The hell?

This is wasteful duplication at its worst. I juxtapose this with the case of having to buy a television set and it's remote control separately from two different suppliers. You can turn on the television set but you would have to walk up to the damn screen just to switch channels. Can't just sink into your sofa and flip channels no more. Whichever provider is the TV or the remote is up for debate...

Dang. Today is a sad day. Give me back my monopoly. Screw this duopoly.

What say you? As I've said, I never had the answers.
Please wait. Focus is of the utmost importance now.

This is hard o.0

2009-10-03T21:49:00.002+08:00

Damn... why didn't anyone tell me it was so damn hard to get back to the studying mood after slacking off (like totally) for an entire week...
Zomg...
This is really tough haha.
Really not used to studying wth.
My longest rally: 2.5 hours
It's like how my stamina has descended into an unknown abyss where I can barely do 2km.
Yes life is tough...

How?

lol... yet another question I have no answer to at the moment.

When the unknown dawns.

2009-10-01T23:03:00.001+08:00

And so I pray.

2009-09-28T23:45:00.001+08:00

Anyone think i can make it into Oxford?
lol.
just a random thought that popped up.

2009-09-28T13:39:00.002+08:00

Haha sorry I had nothing better to do. Well I've just been frolicking around after the Prelims.
If you get it? Great. If not, haha I'd gladly explain it to you over msn... dimwit :D

2009-09-28T13:30:00.002+08:00

HOLA~

Haha it really has been a while.
Well apologies to the person who has been faithfully dropping by only to find this place stagnant. Yes I have once again lowered my expectations such that a sole visitor would suffice (: Well this is the place where I rant about life, whining, complaining like a petty little girl. Wouldn't want too many people loitering around now would I? (:

Well Prelims have finally ended. Dang those two weeks were arduous as hell and damn am I happy that they've gone by. A few more days of just stoning before it's back to business~
Hopefully I did fine... Hopefully...
Even though to be honest, I'm starting to find hope a mere facade. A cop out of what is and what is to be. Sorry. Haha the ostentatious display of optimism that I exude is but a cover up for the pessimism within.
I don't know it's just grown and swallowed me up. Damn. Maybe things don't usually work out the way I want them to. Just maybe.

Nonetheless there's no reason to give up. Who says you have to give up when you're pessimistic?

2009-08-23T00:17:00.002+08:00

Crap...
I think it's happening again...
I'd like to think i got out of the previous predicament sharper and more discerning.
Damn Damn Damn. Apparently not.
Lol.

How?
You tell me.

THIS SHALL NOT DISTRACT ME. SORRY.

2009-08-16T23:35:00.000+08:00

21 Guns by Green Day~

Do you know what's worth fighting for?
When it's not worth dying for?
Does it take your breath away
And you feel yourself suffocating?

Does the pain weigh out the pride?
And you look for a place to hide?
Did someone break your heart inside?
You're in ruins

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms, give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky, you and I

When you're at the end of the road
And you lost all sense of control
And your thoughts have taken their toll
When your mind breaks the spirit of your soul

Your faith walks on broken glass
And the hangover doesn't pass
Nothing's ever built to last
You're in ruins

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms, give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky, you and I

Did you try to live on your own
When you burned down the house and home?
Did you stand too close to the fire
Like a liar looking for forgiveness from a stone?

When it's time to live and let die
And you can't get another try
Something inside this heart has died
You're in ruins

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms, give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms, give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky, you and I
___________________________________________

Totally awesome...
And yeah~ there's no point in fighting. Ever.
Peace.

What if I don't have an answer?

2009-08-07T23:39:00.000+08:00

There comes a point in time where we have to decide what we want to do for the rest of our lives. Be it to sing, teach, dance, treat, think, dream...

I've always envied people who know what they want to do, what they want to be. It's like they have a purpose and a goal in life. All they have to do is to work towards it.
Unfortunately, i'm one of those who have yet to figure out what i want to do. My case is like a pendulum that swings back and forth. Kind of like how bis decide which gender to go for each day. Today i may have an inclination for economics, the next day, it's medicine.
Dang i seriously can't make up my mind. People have been telling me that i'm a dude and i have time to mull over this. However much that is true, i kind of like to get answers to questions that i have. I don't like leaving things hanging. Haha maybe that's why i can't do philosophy. Why answer a question with another question? The heck? Haha

For some reason, these days i've been obsessed with finding out what people think i'll grow up to become. And if i discount the first two answers of pimp and social escort (which is like.. omg i so want to pick those up -_-), mostly everyone says i'll end up in business o.0
Dang haha a new entrant into my list of potential careers.

What to do... what to be...
i wish i had the answers.

2009-07-29T22:57:00.000+08:00

JUST CAUSE I WANTED TO RANT.

Haha i'm just so full of angst at this very moment.
The source of my frustration?
PLANT CLONING.
I'm just wondering what it's doing in the bio syllabus.
Right it's so applicable and appropriate to study.
Right after i learn about how to treat genetic diseases i learn how to clone plants!
Yeah the train of thought is so obvious.

This sentence kept banging the walls of my headed while i was forcing myself to read that impossibly long set of notes.
"OK you gotta be kidding me. WTF plant cloning?"

Yes. Back-up plan if i can't decide what i want to be in the future.
NEW AGE HORTICULTURIST.
Grow sexy flowers that can talk.
awesome...

OK
Finally got that angst of my shoulder haha.
Back to normal~

2009-07-26T22:25:00.000+08:00

无聊中听到一首令人深思之歌.
所谓"非你莫属",可能是一时的冲动盲目罢了.

2009-07-25T20:06:00.000+08:00

38.2

The highest temperature that i remember ever recording.
Like seriously haha. It only just occurred to me that the new thermometer that i have been placing much of my faith in isn't all too faithful...
No wonder it kept indicating that i was really cold and all. Not that i'm not cool or anything.
Bah... So fret no more for this old thermometer is more trusty than ever.
Yes...

It's kind of weird and ironic how falling ill makes one pensive. Lying there in bed... i got all sorts of weird thoughts. Like seriously. For those who know me well enough, trust me those thoughts were really weird.
Thinking about life, love, life some more, castles, flying shit and crazy ass super powers. I know... try being me for a moment.

Life is kind of like a book ain't it.
We all start on page one, not knowing what it's all going to be about.
Of course this book has no cover page, no little write up at the back giving you a gist of how life unfolds.
It's full of surprises, sometimes the suspense draws you in and you can't stop reading.
At other times you just don't want to go on, but hey sorrow is as good a reason there is to continue. To press on. Never to give up.
Sometimes you just want to turn the pages back and read through the whole section again. To have those experiences once more or better still re-write life. Unfortunately, life isn't all that fair. 1) We can't go back in time. 2) We can't change what's already done.
Yeah life is just tough like that. Accept it and go forth.

That's how it is and will always be.

Go forth and embrace the future.

2009-07-09T22:54:00.001+08:00

ZOMG IT JUST OCCURRED TO ME HOW CLOSE THE PRELIMS ARE
WHICH JUST MEANS THAT THE A LEVELS ARE DRAWING NEAR!
OMG OMG OMG

Ok.
I need to start working hard.
I need to turn on super saiyan mugger mode.
I need to do up a plan.
I need to sleep.

2009-07-04T22:45:00.004+08:00

There we go...
Sorry for the large size...
Had some issues with blogger's image uploader...
Then had even more issues with the resolution...
...

2009-07-04T22:17:00.007+08:00

WASSUP HOMIESSS

Ok haha sorry i haven't actually been very active...
1) C'mon cut me some slack
2) I just finished a marathon
3) Get used to it ;D

Ah CTs are over~
Not that i'm overly ecstatic cause i'm not exactly that confident all of a sudden haha

Anyways, on the bright side this, just means a transient break.
Short, yes.
Inconsequential, yes.
BUT I WILL SAVOR EVERY FRIGGING SECOND OF IT.

Yes, after what i've been through, i freaking need this.
The past 3 weeks hasn't exactly been a holiday per se.
There were fleeting moments that gave some semblance of a holiday...
But on the whole, urhhh. Words can't exactly accurately articulate what a blast of a time i really had.

Anyways, this is just the experience that some guy i met had during his holiday...
Not me in any way. Nope.

Eh... my image won't go up...

2009-05-23T23:45:00.002+08:00

Haha Haha
HAHA HAHA

I just can't seem to believe how it all turned out.
It just won't sink in. Haha i never really believed in fairy tale endings...but now i think there is some degree of truth to them :D

Never getting into the finals even once in 5 years is tough. Honestly. But being able to end it off in such a manner just blows me away.

Haha gawd. I don't even know what to say anymore.

Either way, i'm really thankful for meeting the bunch of asswipes i call my team mates.
Yes they may have tainted my mind, made me the vulgar and crude idiot i am today (I was seriously damn guai and innocent before JC~), ah yes injured me and all that sort of rubbish; but they were the ones who ran those henny mullers with me, the ones who picked me up when i was down, the ones who put me together when i was shattered, the ones who were always there for me. They were the ones who became champions with me, finally. Thus i am thankful.
Thank you for the memories. Haha i know i'm not mushy enough to do it in your face... but yeah i really do mean it.

Finally. We've got the happy ending that we were all chasing after. Finally.

No one disses us again.

For today i am king.

2009-05-21T20:40:00.001+08:00

It's time.
Finally.

2009-05-20T20:05:00.002+08:00

So it all boils down to this.
1 match, 60 minutes.
It's kind of weird how in retrospect 6 years went by so fast yet so slow.
Just like that. Just like that.

60 minutes is all i have.
And 60 minutes is all i need.

No regrets. None.

2009-05-04T20:50:00.001+08:00

For tomorrow i roar.
Trust me. Get out of the way.

2009-05-03T21:44:00.003+08:00

Mmm

Haha it has once again been a long while since i dumped any of my incessant rants or grievances of life here...

Call it lazy, call it busy, call it just being me.
Procrastination is just this innate part of my life that i can't erase.
Whenever i have something to do, i'll do my really accurate estimations (or so i think anyways) on how long i'll take for this and for that; my final conclusion is usually: No shit, you can slack.
Yeah and that's when the issues occur...

Pfft
The last and final season has kicked off and hell it'll be the semis on Tuesday.
To think that my time here as a rugby player is about to come to a close.
Dang 6 years... just suddenly seems so short...

2 more games.
120 minutes for me to give it my all.
120 minutes to prove that i'm not a loser.
120 minutes to make up for all the let downs.
120 minutes till it's all over.

Destroy.

2009-04-24T20:01:00.000+08:00

****

2009-04-09T21:43:00.003+08:00

April the 9th.
Just another insignificant day in a year of 365.
I was rather indifferent starting the day. For some reason, it really felt like just another insignificant day. For real haha.
But... haha this naive little idiot has no idea how lucky he is... and sometimes this idiot really takes things for granted haha.

Today has to be the most uber duber awesomest day i've ever had. Haha this surge of euphoria...Gawd i've missed it for way too long :)

So. All i can say is. Thank you.
Thank you for all the wishes.
Thank you for all the sweet messages.
Thank you for the gifts.
Thank you for the cakes.
Thank you for making today so special.
Thank you for making me feel so special.

That's all i can do for now. Haha. There really is no way that i can match the gratitude i have for everyone who contributed to this day with any tangible "remuneration". Maybe when i make my first billion, i'll buy each of ya'll a porche~
So, Thank you once again from the depths of my seriously deep heart.

And yeah let me just say... replying to fb wishes really is a b*tch. HAHA

And lastly, to the group of B******s who really topped the day off with the caking event...
You asswipes haha! But thank you... What would i do without the bunch of you idiots? Hahaha

~ woah it's quite ironic how things fluctuate and change so fast. Damn i wish this could just last a little longer. Maybe it'll linger on for a while :)
Dang the moon is really really round and bright today... Too bad the clouds are out. Haha if they weren't, the stars would just top off my day a second time :D

I'll make it out of this. I'll make it to that other side. That i promise you. So thank you.
crazy self-indulgent red indian rugger.